I’m on a work trip down in Montgomery. It’s only been two days but it has already been hell. My flight was canceled three fucking times, and I was stuck in the Atlanta airport for 10+ hours. I finally get to my work site to find out they canceled my hotel room because I “no showed”. Luckily, one of my managers booked me another room.
I’m on the top floor, right next to the presidential suite. I can see the whole city, and a bit of the river. I get free drinks and I have a separate bath tub and shower, and a king sized bed. I kinda feel like a celeb. It’s super nice…. but I keep wishing I had someone to share it with. That’s cheesy as fuck, but I can’t help having someone cross my mind.
The days are filled with scanning moldy computers and greasy gas stoves. Every so often thunder breaks through the walls of my noise canceling headphones. I try to let my mind drift but it keeps anchoring itself to one thing.
I keep replaying things in my head, small minute moments. I wish they played out a little differently, and that I could be a little bolder, but I am so deathly afraid of something. I don’t want to be disappointed again, and I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. It’s like whenever he’s around I forget everything I’ve ever known, and I can’t push myself to be forward.
Some are telling me that it’s ok for it to go slow, and eventually it’ll pan out. Others are telling me I need to do something before it’s too late. I’m stuck. I hope my awkwardness is cute and not off putting.
Pray for me
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Cash